How to prevent and relieve constipation?

My father hasn't been to the toilet for days, he's uncomfortable, has no appetite, and is more irritable. How can I help him relieve constipation and prevent it from happening again?

It's a more frequent and uncomfortable problem than many people imagine, and your concern at seeing him so uncomfortable is understandable. The good news is there's a lot you can do day-to-day.

Why it happens

In dementia, several factors combine: less water and less fibre, little physical activity, some medications, and difficulty recognising or communicating the urge to go to the toilet. Prolonged constipation can cause pain, loss of appetite, and even agitation or confusion.

Practical strategies

• Offer liquids throughout the day (water, soup, tea, jelly).
• Include fibre: fruit, vegetables, soup, wholemeal bread, prunes.
• Encourage daily movement, even if it's a short walk.
• Create a toilet routine, for example, after breakfast.
• Ensure privacy, comfort, and time, without rushing.
• Monitor frequency and make notes to understand his pattern.

What NOT to do

• Do not use laxatives regularly without medical guidance.
• Do not reduce liquids for fear of incontinence.
• Do not ignore several days without bowel movements or abdominal pain.

When to seek professional help

Speak to the treating doctor if several days pass without a bowel movement, there is severe pain, bloating, vomiting, or blood. You can clarify doubts via the SNS 24 Helpline (808 24 24 24). Review with the doctor if any medication contributes to the problem.

"I didn't understand why he was so irritable. It was constipation. With more water and prunes at breakfast, everything changed." — Anonymous carer